ProPER way to form a good habit.

good habits

“I am your constant companion. I am your greatest helper or heaviest burden. I will push you onward and upward or drag you down to failure. I am completely at your command. Ninety percent of things you do might just as well be turned over to me, and I will be able to do them quickly and correctly. I am easily managed, show me exactly how you want something done and after a few lessons I will do them automatically. I am the servant of all great people and, alas! of all failures as well. I am not a machine, though I work with all the precision of a machine, plus intelligence of a man. You can run me for profit or run me for ruin – it makes no difference to me. Take me, train me, be firm with me, and I will place the world at your feet. Be easy with me and I will destroy you. Who am I? I am habit.” – Author Unknown

Meriam-Webster dictionary defines habit as a usual way of behaving or something that a person does often in a regular and repeated way.

A lot of successful people reiterate the importance of forming good habits to achieve success and I could not agree more. The things that you do daily, define who you will be in the future. Let us say for instance that you make it a habit to wake up early in the morning and run several miles around the city, tendency is you will be enjoying the benefits of having a fit physique. That is a good example of a good habit. In contrast, if it is your habit to sip a glass of wine every other hour then the outcome of that habit could possibly be alcoholism.

Now we understand that our habits can make us or break us. Of course I will not waste your time reading about forming bad habits, instead, let me share to you 4 points that you can do to form good habits, I will call it the ProPER way to form a good habit.

First: Prompt.

In theater, we call someone who gives an actor the trigger or cue as the prompter. The same principle applies in forming good habits. We must first think about that particular habit that we want to acquire and prompt ourselves to start doing it. For example, if we want to form a good habit of waking up early every morning, our prompt could be an alarm. So the first thing that we need to do is to remind ourselves to set an alarm in the evening so that we can wake up early the next day.

Second: Perform.

After setting a prompt, we should make sure to do the very thing that we prompted ourselves to do. This is the perform part. So if we base it in the above example, if we set an alarm for us to wake up early in the morning then we should perform by immediately getting out of bed.

Third: Enjoy.

After successfully performing what you prompted yourself to do then it is time for you to enjoy its benefits which leads to having a sense of fulfillment.

Fourth: Repeat.

Repeat this over again until it becomes a habit. Time will come when you will no longer have to prompt yourself to perform because it has already become part of your system.

Apply the above principle every time you want to start a good habit and see how your life will change.

Challenge yourself now and follow the ProPER way to form good habits!

Habits aristotle

AMALAYER – ONE CASE OFF THE COURT DOCKETS.

Note: This article has been migrated from my other website.  I decided to transfer all the articles here before it shuts down.  Read on.

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amalayer1As a public attorney, we help de-clog court dockets by conducting a pre-litigation conference, during which we play the role of a mediator and enlighten both parties of their rights and obligations.  The conference aims to explore possible remedies for the parties to avoid going through the hassle and inconvenience of court proceedings.

As advocates of fairness and equality, we become instant pastors by trying to convince the parties to forgive and start anew.

Let me walk you through a scenario upon the termination of a pre-litigation conference. Some of our clients, after venting and realizing the benefits of offering forgiveness, walk out of our office with a brighter perspective about life.  The forgiven party on the other hand, if wise enough, upon realizing that he was given a second chance will now be extra careful and consider the repercussions of his future actions.  The public attorney, after successfully convincing each party will take a deep breath, sit back, sip his coffee and say that “this is one of the best days ever”.

However, the above scenario more often than not is a product of wishful thinking. There are still many who decide to pursue their case even if it is not worth fighting for.  But mind you, after experiencing a full-blown trial, they would have regretted not forgiving on the outset.  But again, not all cases are the same.  There are still those that necessitate a court battle and per experience this usually happens when the accused in criminal cases is not remorseful.

After watching “Maalaala Mo Kaya”, which featured the life of Paula Jamie Salvosa, the girl who became famous because of her viral video “amalayer”. I Googled her name and found out that she is now a full-time campus minister.  I also read a statement where she said: “Maayos na lahat.  Nakahanda na yung ebidensiya.  Kakasuhan ko sila, because I want to be vindicated.  Pero hindi ko tinuloy, because I got the best lawyer, and that is God.”  Her decision meant one case off the court dockets.

Because Salvosa forgave the person who uploaded the “amalayer” video, I consider her as an ideal client for a public attorney who is swamped with paper works, jail visits, court appearances and client calls.  But more than that, I see her as an example of a person who experienced the beauty and freedom of being forgiven and being able to forgive.

The “amalayer” incident would have been the igniting point for several cases to be filed by the people involved but Salvosa, instead, chose to learn a lesson from it and resolved to settle the matter in her heart, extra-judicially.

I would like to reiterate that one of the most effective methods to de-clog our court dockets is the offering of forgiveness or the asking for it.  I am saying this, not only because of Salvosa’s story, but because I have experienced it.

Just recently, my wife and I could have filed a case against someone for grave oral defamation, but the bigger person in us decided not to.  Besides, we’d better focus in our work and advocacies rather than sow hatred in our hearts.  Again, just like the “amalayer” incident, that is one case off the court dockets!

Indeed, ang buhay ay parang gulong. Some days we are up and some days we are down. There will certainly come a time that we will need to receive someone else’s forgiveness.  Realizing that, I want to say that if it is in our hands to forgive then we’d better.

The next time you feel like suing someone, and especially if it is just for the sake of it, think again.  Forgive, because that will be one case off the court dockets!

Note: This article was published in The Baguio Midland Courier on August 3, 2014.